Valentines Day

It's Valentines Day. I'm single this Valentines but that is not why it is sucky. What sucks is that people who do have that somebody special just seem to blow it off and they don't really appreciate what they have.

I'm thinking about the young wife who spends all her breaks at work with a man who is not her husband and goes to his house to watch movies while her husband sits at home alone. The husband goes home for lunch only to find that his house is empty and that his wife has forgotten about him and has gone to the other man's house for lunch. He loves his wife but his wife is immature and sees no harm in what she is doing. To show his wife how much he loves her he bought her expensive jewelry and a game for valentines as well as re-created the bouquet she had for their wedding. How romantic! Why can't she see? Why does this pain exist? Why doesn't she see how much the husband loves her?

I don't understand what's going on but one thing I know is that all I can do is pray for them.

I am looking for someone special. A man who loves me with all his heart and will spend his life dedicated to me. A man who won't give up when the going gets tough and who will stand by my side no matter what.

it's time for a rant

Something that annoys me is the question "how are you?" when you run into a random someone. You may know them or it may be an employee somewhere. Of course the answer we all give is, "I'm fine, how are you?" so if we know the answer why do we ask? I don't feel fine or good or happy but nobody wants to hear that.

I miss having someone I could be totally honest with and to whom I could tell anything and everything. I am trying to give it all to God and I unload all my problems and stuff to him but I just really need a physical human right now. I believe God created us to need others for support and to help us through tough times and encourage us. Sure I talk to my sister and my mom and my friends but the thing is there is not one person I can tell all to. My mom and sister don't have the best of relationships so I can't really talk to much about the other to them. I'm not close enough to tell any of my friends the situations I'm stick in the middle of. People trust me and confide in me and here I am walking around knowing different sides of stories but nobody knows that I know the stuff. I don't know how to deal anymore. I need to escape.

I'm just tired. Tired of waiting. Tired of stupid people. Tired.